Very Real Journalist Who Exists
Overconfident Improviser Squats One Too Many Times in Rehearsal
After driving a scene about squatters toward a lengthy set of actual squats, improviser Heather E. Schwartz found herself regretting that...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Nov 29, 2021
- 1 min
The Internet is going bonkers for this dress from the iSmile ad
The flowered linen frock featured in the latest iSmile commercial has Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, and all manner of social media...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Nov 15, 2021
- 2 min
Funniest Woman on Earth Reacts with Grace and Humor to Competition Loss
When a prestigious national humor contest was announced recently, the hilarious Heather E. Schwartz was immediately inspired, firing off...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Nov 13, 2021
- 0 min
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Oct 16, 2021
- 1 min
Area "It Woman" takes in son's comment about her clothing
While shopping at a Gap store with her teenage son recently, Heather was surprised and confused when he asked her whether she can fit...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Oct 16, 2021
- 2 min
Heather's Top Tips for New Homeowners
Your first home... It's an exciting purchase! And it's completely understandable that you might get carried away by the rush of happy...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Oct 4, 2021
- 1 min
Writer dreams up contest to promo book, forgets to include info in post
It was an awesome idea, and it seemed to spring from nowhere, an experience Heather E. Schwartz was comfortable with, since virtually all...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Sep 25, 2021
- 1 min
Genius aspiring actress creates completely professional DIY reel
Heather had heard you need a reel if you want to get anywhere in the entertainment industry. But she wasn't about to be scammed into...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Sep 16, 2021
- 1 min
Shue tapped for new Netflix series
You adored her in Netflix's most recent success story, "On the Verge," and - let's be honest - never got over her delightful portrayal of...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Sep 9, 2021
- 1 min
Heather reacts to news Britney Spears’ father wants to end the conservatorship
The Internet has been exploding with news about a conservatorship that’s kept Britney Spears’ under the control of others, particularly...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Sep 2, 2021
- 2 min
The Upstate New Yorker "Ramblings of the Region"
INNER WORKINGS EARNEST ENDEAVORS In men’s jeans from Target and a flowing Gap shirt, Heather Schwartz is not exactly glamorous, but she’s...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Sep 1, 2021
- 1 min
Dear Presumably Human Expert Who is Not Google
Q. Callback crickets: I recently had a callback for a role that really excited me. A callback! But then, crickets, even after I wrote...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Aug 23, 2021
- 1 min
Beloved children's book author pens humor guide
Heather E. Schwartz is a household name when it comes to classic children's books. Now, she's breaking out as a comedy writer for a whole...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Aug 20, 2021
- 1 min
Improviser posts video of live show without previewing it first
Confident in the knowledge that impov is a fleeting art form that disappears into the vapor the moment it's created, Heather Schwartz...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Aug 20, 2021
- 1 min
Author realizes it's her job to actually tell bookstore owners and managers that she exists
Did local author Heather E. Schwartz feel slighted upon seeing that the "Local Authors" section of Barnes & Noble held not one of the...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Aug 19, 2021
- 2 min
Comedian sort of regrets adding website to email signature
How does one market a new venture without social media? It's the kind of question a person might ask if she's in the mood to ditch...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Aug 19, 2021
- 1 min
Creative artist fails in quest to secure 5 (consecutive) minutes of uninterrupted work time
It was a far-reaching goal, to be sure. But optimistic as ever, Heather thought to herself, "It can't be unattainable. This time, I'll do...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Aug 12, 2021
- 1 min
Improviser dedicates Friday show to new subscribers
The Capital Region's best-known Heather E. Schwartz has announced her first live performance at The Mopco Improv Theatre since 2020 will...
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Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Aug 10, 2021
- 1 min
Local woman literally begs friends to subscribe to blog
It began as a quiet project she wasn't sure she wanted to share with anyone. But it was on the World Wide Web, after all. So local woman...
68 views0 comments
Very Real Journalist Who Exists
- Aug 10, 2021
- 1 min
Self-Tape Superstar Astonished to Realize She Wasn't Cast in Skincare Commercial
Heather was determined to showcase her superior acting skills and prove she was the one and only choice when it came to "Daughter" in...
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It's Fun Being Famous!
Disclaimer: Just to be clear, this is satire.